hot, free, tanned and anxious

What an eventful month November has been... I suppose my head has been spinning with so much new information that I haven't had much of a chance to get it all down. In summary:

At the moment:
* Looking up new laptop to purchase. Not so sure if I should get an Apple or a PC. It's a never-ending debate... and it's a tough one to find a winner to.
* Sorting through 2nd-round university applications. I've sent one to Notre Dame for a Diploma of Education (secondary). I'm mulling over sending one to Sydney Uni for my Masters (something media-related).
* Just read through a UTS information pack (Business).
* Surrounded by: Ferrero Rochers (courtesy of Edwin Adan), documents from work, application forms galore, Lipton Apple Green Tea, clean laundry that needs to be folded, an empty box of NERDS, red roses (also courtesy of Mr Adan), an unmade bed... and a bedroom that needs to be vacuumed.

In the last three weeks I:
* Resigned. Yup - you all knew it was coming. Even then it was probably the toughest decision I've ever made - how do you let go of something that you love but causes you so much grief? At the end of the day I based my decision on the need to distance myself from the things that were causing me stress and pain, and the need to spend my time pursuing things that would ultimately make me happy and peaceful. Final date in the office is Fri Dec 28.

* Was in a car accident. It happened last Wednesday night on my way home from work. Someone in a white sedan merged from the right lane into the middle lane as I was trying to the same thing. When I went back to my lane to avoid them they merged into the left lane too, forcing me to drive onto the shoulder. I lost control of the car, hit the guard rail, did a few fishies and spun across three lanes and onto the right hand shoulder. Lucky it was past 10pm and there wasn't enough traffic to hit or be hit by. But the whole incident has left me shaken, stressed, and feeling somewhat attacked. The total damage to the car tallied up to approx $9,000 (great) and leaves me without a vehicle for the next three weeks. All because someone else felt like speeding on the motorway and cutting across three lanes. And no one stopped to help me either.


* Performed in a girl band. (Act of Faith)

* Finished the final sessions of the CFC Singles for Christ CLP (graduation is this Friday).

* Saved enough dosh for the NZ trip but not enough to actually buy anyone decent Christmas presents. (sorry in advance).

* Have had recurring daydreams about having a lazy month of January. i.e. no work and all play. The fact that I've failed in the savings department may make that daydream hard to turn into reality, but we'll see what happens ay?

* Partied and celebrated the feeling of freedom. Such events include Fr Warren's house-warming BBQ + Beth, Bic and Sarah's 21st.

* Enjoyed Terrigal Beach and the comfort of friendships that can stay the same - even if it's been a year since we've all been together.


Now I'm darker, free-er... and perhaps slightly more anxious. I hope I never forget how free and peaceful I did feel that week I resigned. I'd prayed about it for such a long time, and for the first time in months felt God's hand guiding me to something exhilarating and uniquely written for me. The stress of the car accident, together with how things at work never going as planned, have dampened that spirit of freedom... but I refuse to let it weigh me down.

Next year is a new chapter, a blank canvas... I can see a whole heap of things that can wrong - but a gazillion things that can also go right. And all I need to do is pray for faith and guidance... and the ability to create a decent conclusion to the chapter that is 2007.