conquering the nullabor

Currently surrounded by:
- A dining room full of junk. And by junk I mean a 13 year old organ that no one plays because it sounds off-tune and awful, crates and containers full of things that should never have been kept for longer than five years, numerous CDs, empty boxes that belong in the recycling bin but always seem to find their way out, a bunch of resumes, candle sticks, old floppy disks (and I mean OLD... like the mega huge ones), and a broken silver picture holder-thingy that is holding photos that seriously need replacing.
- 3 apples and a banana
- Numerous family photo albums
- A naked Christmas tree
- Black leather office chair
- Board games

Hmm... so I need to clean and tidy up this living area. Although I don't see the point sometimes, because living life will always include mess... and the only real way to get rid of the mess is to get rid of the stuff that's making the mess - so go figure that one, because I live with a family of professional hoarders. It's only recently we've gathered the courage to let go of the things we were meant to throw out or give away half a decade ago.

I also need to take a shower... but that's not important.

The Christmas tree is in a different place this year. And it's naked except for the Christmas lights, which took forever to put up. I've decided that when I get my own place with my own Christmas tree, screw putting up garlands. I hate them - I can never do them evenly and whenever I try, they make the tree look depressed and confused.

And speaking of confused - that's where I am right now. Woke up this morning after having a very strange dream that involved girls and eggs (the ones you crack and eat, not the ones in your ovaries). After I got over the initial shock of my subconsciousness being able to come up with a dream that was just so weird, I ended up spending a whole hour sitting in my bed and writing in my diary about what turns out to be a very... tiring? weekend.

Because of the weekend, I have several people on "Hero" status at the moment:
- Fr Warren for fearlessly cleaning out the freezer after we discovered it had shortcircuited...and had about 200 sausages just sitting in there.
- Suarez for realising that it is cool to be a gentleman and unlock the car door for a girl before getting in the front seat.
- Eddoes for reaching his goal and eating the larger portion of last night's T-bone steak.
- Dom for his double-shift on a Sunday night and for the best glass of mango iced-tea anyone has ever made for me.
- My Dad.. because he just is a hero.
- Gemma, Lisa & Phil for getting up early on Sunday morning to help out with the fundraising BBQ.

*sigh* You guys rock and keep my smiling!

this moment's threshold

thresh·old (thrĕsh'ōld', -hōld'):

1. A piece of wood or stone placed beneath a door; a doorsill.
2. An entrance or a doorway.
3. The place or point of beginning; the outset.
4. The point that must be exceeded to begin producing a given effect or result or to elicit a response: a low threshold of pain.

*****

*#!%&!!! The noodles had chilli in it. And now I'm sitting on my bed with an awful feeling in my mouth and my tummy... I swear I'm allergic to that stuff - nothing I've ever eaten makes me feel this swollen and headachey.

Right now I'm listening to "Soul to Soul" by Nu Flavour. This, without a doubt, has to be one of my all-time favourite songs, and has been since I discovered it in 8th grade. It's one of those songs that I put on repeat and lie in bed listening to when I feel the need to unwind and find my own little place to be at peace.

Tonight I went to confession, which is always the best way to start new and gain a good perspective on where I'm going and what I'm doing with my life. I've been thinking a lot about next year... about the decisions I've made about what I'll be doing next year... and I figure it's about time I take the leap and leave the past behind me, and let God take hold of all that's in the future.

I hope people understand that that is what I'm doing... and that's why I've chosen to let go of everything stable... because I know the only way I can function is by giving God the reigns. I know that doing so involves a lot of risks. I don't know if I'll make it the entire 2006 without my closest friends around me. I don't know if I'm cut out for hard-core full-time service. I don't know if I'll get along with all my team-mates. I don't know if the things I put on hold today will be around to pick up again 365 days later. But one thing I do know is that nothing is ever certain - it never has been and never will be. The only exception to that rule is God - who is the only one I can trust... and that's why I'm putting my dreams and desires in his hands.

I'm well aware of what I'm risking. But I do believe that the biggest risk is to take no risk at all... and despite all the rational arguments about why I shouldn't give up what I'm about to give up, I'm going to do it anyway - with or without the support of the people I love the most.

There is no risk when one risks everything for God...

On Sunday morning I woke up thinking about the people and the places that I won't get to see everyday. And I thought about the changes that will challenge me... about the homesickness, about the things I will enviously miss out on... about the adventures that won't include me.. about the memories that will be written without me... and I thought that I could start regretting the decison (because there are a few people who still don't understand why I'm doing this and have tried to make me regret...) but then I prayed... and God put his arms around my fearful heart... and brought it back to His peace that I am certain will carry me through any trials that will come my way. I don't regret, and I won't regret because I know God will be scripting His own adventure in my life, He'll be creating a new home for me, and my dreams will soon be a reality of unforgettable memories... 2006 will flash by like a blink of an eye, just as 2005 has.

It is one month until Christmas day.

A piece of newspaper, at my feet
We go blowing down the street
Got our stories, old and new
Need someone to tell them to

We don't have to see eye to eye
Or face to face
I'm not asking for miracles
No saving grace
And I don't need another heart
To have and hold
All I want is a friend that I can talk to
Soul to soul...

Like an old book on a shelf
Tired of talking to myself
I'm wishin somebody passing by
Would pick me up and look inside...

...I just call and there you are
Shining on me like a star... shining down
Smile in my direction in the night
And I'll feel your light...
[soul to soul - nu flavour]

totally random

My mum is listening to The Carpenters downstairs at full volume. I think it's cute.
I'm in the weirdest mood... and crap - I just realised that there's a bowl of 3 minute noodles on the coffee table that has been sitting there for waaaay more than 3 minutes. Crap I should go get'em - that's my dinner...

The best love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds.
[Noah - The Notebook]

warning: this is a whinge fest

What does one write in a critical appraisal when they're pissed off at everyone including themselves? This is the final step for me this semester, and I can't seem to lift my feet and do it because just thinking about our major project pisses me off. I think about how much it sucks, how much it could've been better, how I could've put more effort into leading the group and blah blah blah. Basically there is very little to praise, but a hellavalot to criticise.

Aron says: take it as a learning experience. This is what happens when you don't give your all.

True true - very wise words Master Jedi. I was reading letters from old friends yesterday. Laughing at some statements, cringing at some promises, and smiling at what once was strong, committed and very naive "love." I asked myself: "What the heck happened?" We used to write emails all the time. We visited each other, hung out, talked about really stupid things for hours on end, and shared the deepest darkest secrets. We used to pray together, have worships, go on pointless adventures and quests... we were best friends! What happened?

And then the answer rings loud and clear: This is what happens when you don't give your all.

It's an ugly feeling, when you think "What if I'd tried harder? What if I had given everything?"

And then I ask myself why I didn't try my best back then, and the answers usually don't seem justified. In the case of this major, I think I just stopped caring. But now I do care... and it's too late to fix the damage. How depressing. So now I need to start this thing. It's not due til Friday, but I refuse to be riddled with the guilt of leaving it to the last minute. I want to be free....

I feel though, that the problem isn't my fault... but I still have to cop the hurt for it. Man - why is that? Why do I have to pick up the broken pieces after people drop what they promised they'd carry? Why can't people just be responsible and is it ok if... just for a short while... I don't have to be?

confounded writers block

Ok so I've been sitting here for a while. It never ceases to amaze me what length I will go to find something new to do - totally not uni-related and non-assignment-related. Like today was a perfect opportunity to get this blasted major finished, but this afternoon consisted of falling asleep amongst open library books and then rummaging through a plastic crate of high school items and reading old letters.

Now it's already Sunday night; and my word count is down from 1300 to 0. Gargh! How did that happen? Don't ask. But I'm just glad because at this time tomorrow... it'll be over. =p whooptiedoo!

Ok ok... stop procrastinating Joy!

So the crux of my argument will be found somewhere amongst this convolution:

It's no secret that Western society is being hammered with the anti-terrorism doctrine. It's all over the mass media - in our news broadcasts, radio commentaries, web sites, music, school curriculum and government policy.

But the terror that we are being told to fear and avoid is not limited to the ignorant definition of hi-jackers, suicide bombers and the over-zealous religious fundamentalist. The fear that we are being fed is the fear that drives us and our development – it’s the fear of not being good enough. We fear being ill-equipped for what is to come. We need the latest information, the latest gossip, the latest trend, the latest ideas and most importantly – the latest identity.

While some theorists will argue that technology fosters and encourages unification by transcending the barriers of space and time, I argue that technology has done more to leave individuals feeling more fragmented and confused about who we are. We are left feeling terrified that we don’t have what it takes to be ourselves.

What? Sorry? Don’t get the jist? Look around at the marketing and advertising messages that fill the margins on our web browser and the 15 minutes of “preview time” before the movie starts. Buy this brand. Purchase this phone. Try this mp3 player. If you want to be successful, you will have that. If you want to be up there with the greatest business men, then you will drive this car. If you want your life to be good, you will use this refrigerator and that flatscreen tv. Boys will come running when you adopt her style. Girls will fall for you if you wear that cologne. By having the best, we will be the best.

We are obsessed with being better than… who? What? It doesn’t really matter who the scapegoat is – we just want to be better than it.

Our sense of self and value doesn’t end at the commodities we purchase either. We make sure the world knows that we are better.

Our identity us created and manipulated, strained and changed, conjured and altered at the tips of our fingers. Who am I? Deconstruct my MSN nickname. Find me @hotmail.com. Browse through my Friendster profiles. Read the blog and testimonials. Count the friends I have and check the photos that I post. Enter my world. Enter my space. Enter my cyberspace.

We are obsessed with being connected. By sharing our thoughts, our possessions, our opinions, or photos, our ideas – we share our lives… and create them. The persona on Friendster is different to the persona @youroffice_or_employee_inbox.com. The conversation between you and the rest of the world via Blogspot.com will reveal a different persona to that found between the 1-2-1 conversation between your best friend and the you on your Nokia mobile phone. There are hundreds of different Yous. Fragments overlap, but in essence each time technology allows you to connect with someone new, a new you is created.

So which you is the real you? Or are they all real? I dunno - you tell me. Which you is the one that's good enough? Marketing and advertising will tell us that none of them are. So we try harder. Buy more things, make more "me's." In the process, what was once private becomes public and we evolve into a voyueristic society where surveillance is no longer seen as a threat, but rather a chance to display onceself under the gaze of others with a desperate hope for approval.

The fear that we are being fed is the fear that drives us and our development – it’s the fear of not being good enough.

You may think that this argument is far too cynical. Surely there are advantages to technological, communication and information development that I'm not addressing. Yes, you're right - but it doesn't change the sadness of our situation.
We will rejoice over the abundance of choice now available to us. Whether it is cars, commodities, computers or consciences... but just remember that is was free will that confused us and stuffed us up in the first place. =P

troubleshooting life

It's funny... I always seem to do the worst things best. Like... I'm the best at procrastinating. I'm the best at being complicated. I'm the best at leaving things to the very last minute. I'm the best at confusing people. I'm the best at drinking coffee at the worst time of the day.

Hahahaha... but who cares?!

Hey so I have vain sunflower wearing green Chucks hanging on my bedroom mirror. It's got the funniest smile - a smile so big that its eyes are closed. And I was drawing on my mirror with coloured highlighters about five minues ago. And tabbing my library books about five minutes before that. Attempted to watch the end of "The Incredibles" on my broken TV about five minutes before that. And... was actually working on my assig. about five minutes before all that.

I figure I'll call it quits on this essay at about 2am - if I make it that far. I totally bludged off today... hahaha.... but I'm not complaining. Being in the company of my hh is a total crack-up. If the four people who were watching Aladdin today started a band, I'd call it "Something for Jane." Hahahaa... AY?

New Scientist ran a special issue on "Creativity" the other week. After having read it, I realised I have very little. How depressing.

So here's a question I'll throw out there to the general public: If you had a band, what weird names would you call it?

At the moment my favourite suggestions have included "No Through Road," and "Docile Violation." I just thought of one that I'd dedicated to Ryan: "Sheeps and Fishes." Ok... your turn!

ghost of a good thing

(Thought this might motivate all those students dying from exams and what not... and if it's not exams, whatever angst you're going through...)

There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.

The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.

When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen.

The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted.
The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise.
The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen.
The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfilment.

The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only one season in the tree's life.

He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up.

If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfilment of your fall.

Moral:

Don't let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest.

Don't judge life by one difficult season.

Persevere through the difficult patches and better times are sure to come some time or later.

progress report: 0119 hours: getting into character

I've allowed myself a bit of a break before I get stuck into my 3rd storyboard for the evening.
Did a strange thing five minutes go. Went to boil some water for a cup of coffee, walked upstairs while the kettle was boiling to brush my teeth? Ewww man. Coffee after toothpaste is one of the WORST mixes EVER. So what's with at? Just goes to show I'm sleepy. It's past 1am.
Had a lovely power nap on the couch at about 6:30pm.
I realised that this would be the very thing that a character like Rei Phuong would do - she'd stay up to the ridiculous hours of the night finishing off an assignment.

On a totally pointless note, I've been singing the first 2 words of "Heaven Is A Place On Earth," randomly over the past three weeks. Out of no where I'll belt out, "ooh baby..." and because I didn't know which song that particular line came from, I couldn't keep going. But then I heard it on 106.5 FM today on the way to uni and realised that it was Cindy Lauper's voice in my head all that time... yeeshk!

And another thing; my roomy and my Dad walk down the stairs similarly now. used to know it was my Dad approaching just by how he walked down the stairs... but now I can't tell. Not that that's important; but I thought I'd get that out as well.

It's late. I wonder if I lie down on the couch, if I'll manage to get up within two hours. HAHA. Yeah right ay!

the final count-down

In the labs with a #)!%&load of work to do. Didn't feel like lunch, so my so-called lunch break involved a 17minute conversation with Amardeep, enrolling my my Vacation Unit at MCSI (yes, I'm doing a Summer subject! Go me!), deciding to jig my 2pm lecture (because if he hasn't taught me anything useful this entire sem, what makes me think he'll pull through at the last minute???), and buying a $1 Lime COKE from a Korean guy from a Korean club. Nice huh?

Hmm... I'm procastinating again. And you know what? I shouldn't be because I know the next 24 hours will involve my semester tradition of pulling a marvellous all-nighter. Why am I not surprised that I'm gonna pulling together the loose strands of this major work two days before it's due date? Haahaa... and why do I pretend that I'm the slightest bit peeved? I saw this coming - so there you go... Hahaha... Ah well - I'm not fussed. I haven't pulled an all-nighter yet (not this sem anyway) so the ritual MUST not be ignored - it must be performed with style and grace.

So this week... this week is gonna be the fastest and most annoying week of the month of November. This week is tutorial analysis, major work, class presentation, critical appraisal and then major essay. But this time next week (I hope) I'll be FREE. FREE FREE FREE! Free as a bird until January some time. =P

But you know what? Right now... I'm HAPPY. HAPPY. DOCILE. AT PEACE. Laughing at myself and smirking constantly because every now and again, I remember something stupid that happened this weekend and want to laugh, but instead I think, "THANK YOU GOD," for pulling me through what could've been an emotional breakdown.

Since last Thursday's mishap of a sook, I've experienced:
- God's presence at the FFD. YAY! Praise God.
- Tinkering on the keys at a grand piano and playing praise songs til the late hours of a Friday evening.
- Feeling whispers at my heart through the words of friends (and some strangers) that affirmed me never to lose hope... even when you can't see it.
- A change of perspective.
- A chick-flick with my mission partz. What a dag... buhahaha - and stop telling everyone I chose that movie, coz you know I didn't!!! But yeh... the new HOYTS smells like stale new-car-smell.
- My monthly dose of early morning Mass... with a lot of giggles and embarrassment. Royce is wonderful - he reminded me: God is happy even with the smallest offerings.
- Breakfast at Lukes! WOW! We haven't done that in AGES!! And it was the maddest brekky ever... cooked with love by Cres and Lukage: pandesal, mi goreng, eggs and NZ butter. Mmmmm-mmmmm....
- A chick-flick with Suarez and Eddoes. Now how the heck did you guys fall for that one? Hahaha.. and I'm sorry but YES I did cry, and NO I'm NOT embarrassed BUT YES I did hide behind a pillow at the end of the movie. Hahaha...
- Spontaneous 1-2-1 dinner which reminded me of the simple pleasures of life: faith, simplicity, God, friendship, honesty, prawn pizza and fulfilling Italian food.

Having said all that... I am officially BLESSED.

I'm a sucker for a lot of things - rainbows, walking weather, gifts on no particular occassion, the perfect bouquet of colourful tulips, taking artistic photos, collecting funny postcards, staying up on a hot night to look at old diary entries, being seranaded... I'm a romantic, and I apologise for being such a sop.

At the moment I am trying to get over a headache that came around about a month ago and hasn't left since. It comes and goes, fades in and out - but it's always there, like a splinter lodged between the left and right hemisphere. Today it came back after the sixth hour of staring at the computer screen. *sigh* The Headache likes to feed on my best ideas, most creative thoughts and has officially sucked the life out of me.

Over the week I have realised that I am such an idiot because I always end up taking stupid risks without thinking much about the consequences. This is part of my personality that makes me either inspiring or vulnerable... but rarely both at the same time. The primary feeling that I encounter more often is stupid vulnerability. And I hate it... because it's humiliating and makes me want to puke.

Like tonight my Mum asked me what the g-o is with the man (or men) in my life. And all I could say was, "I dunno." And it wasn't the teenage-angst get-away-from-me-i-don't-wanna-disclose-embarrasing-details-to-you-coz-you're-my-mum type of "I dunno" - it was the real answer to a very real question: because I JUST DON'T KNOW what the hell is going on. I wish I did have an answer for her, because she hardly ever asks about anything going on in my life - she's always asking about my sisters... so tonight was a rare moment and I'm kind of annoyed because I wanted to know the answer just as much (if not more) than she did.

And there it is: my need to know the answer. It gets in me in so much trouble.

"Love is patient." *sigh* For someone who has read so many books on the topic, I'm absolutely pathetic at practicing the first virtue concerning love. Patience. Yeeshk.

Pardon me for venting such frustrations. I guess the fear has finally caught up with me. It's been a few months of having my head in the clouds; and now my heart is in the history books.

And that's what freaks me out... what if I can't change? What if I'm destined to be the person that I was six years ago? Because it feels like every time I try to change... it comes creeping back. And no matter how much I lift up the brokenness, the hurts and the frustration to God... the people who I love the most are the people who seem to end up hurting me the most. Why is that? When will this cycle end?

I used to believe that cynicism would save me from the pain when I fell. I was right... but only for a while. Now I just feel like I'm walking on the same type of glass that cut my feet back during year 12. !$)&*#@^!

I just want to get over this and move on.

"Love is patient." Oh Lord... please teach me how to love.

emotionally docile

Status report: In the dining room, home alone and appreciating this gorgeous Spring day by sporting black shorts and a green boob tube. Craving a Mango WEIS bar.
Breakfast Menu: Chocolate ice cream and pandesal. (very nutricious...)
Lunch Menu: Potato bake, Sour Cream & Onion Pringles, and Apple & Guava juice.

My hair is wirey - the way it would be if I'd spent a week at the pool, only I haven't been swimming in a public pool in over 8 months... so I dunno what the g-0 is there... And here i am; just sent at e-mail out RE: tomorrow's FFD which starts at 7pm (for those in the area: come join us; it'll be awesome!)

I'd just like to say: my life is testimony to answered prayers. When I blogged at uni yesterday, I wrote something along the lines of:

I was walking to the SAM shop this morning and realised it was a dangerous day to wear a skirt (the Spring-time breeze... hmmm...). So I heard a voice in my head say, "God... please clear the sky and make it sunny." And another voice replied and said; "Joy, I already got you out of bed... that's enough miracles for the day."

You know what happened? The sun came out... and it was brilliantly sunny. So sunny that I wanted to jump into the nearest fridge and snooze there for a few hours. But the point is: the sky was cleared and suddenly, it was sunny. What a miracle! =) Is God the BEST or what? I'm not saying the weather revolves around me... hahaha... although I did wake up this morning and felt like the sky was painted blue just for me. Because I love sky blue... and this is just one of those perfect ice-cream-weather days that would made for a perfect excuse to go for a drive to "Notting Hill" and watch the world pass by.
Strange because I was in such a weird mood yesterday... but today I'm ok. Today, I'm what Anthony would call "emotionally docile" - I'm not delirious and moody... which apparently I was during lunch yesterday. Maybe it was the girl-talk with Jonna that changed my perspective on things. Or maybe it was the steak and salad from the SAM bar. Or maybe it was the visit and the laughing, and the over-the-phone prayers last night.

Yesterday I realised that one of the friends I've been hanging with lately is lot funnier than I used to think he was - but maybe it's because my sister and I are so easily amused. =p It makes me smile when I think about how much one person can make me laugh... and how nice it is that are people in my life who always seem to bring me back to reality. And my reality isn't a sad or depressing reality... it's a faithful reality - which I quite like.

I've been re-reading books on my shelf instead of reading the new ones that I've bought. Yesterday morning, I came across a quote from St Andrew that struck me again (I say "again" because it obviously struck me the first time, since I highlighted it) -

"I would not have preached about the glory of the cross of Jesus if I were also not willing to die upon it!"

I thought that was beautiful and powerful stuff - he had said it in reply to a governor who threatened to crucify him if he didn't stop preaching the message of Jesus. I think it's strange that we so often look for something better than what we have, or try to be better than what we are - yet we're adamant about holding onto everything we have or are. I realised the only way to experience the best is to give up the worst - to let go of our own lives and adopt that of Another, more beautiful, more exciting and more fulfilling...

I'll admit that sacrifice is not the most exciting of things to experience - we're not taught to delay gratification very often in today's "give-it-to-me-baby" culture - but I still believe that it's important to do things right. To do things in the best way we know how.

"If you really desire to one day discover the 'beautiful side of love,' you have to first walk through the 'painful side.' Just like pouring concrete is not the exciting part of building a house yet it is the essential part, the same is true with building a magnificent romance. Laying your life down is not the fun and enjoyable part: it's the essential part."

because I'm just too lazy...

Can't be bothered to re-do a blog , so now you're stuck with reading one from uni...

For a limited time only you can see my really daggy attempt at children's book production - last sem's m/media project that's still hosted on my uni server (but I'm sure won't be for long). If it takes ten years to load on your slow dial up Net speed - SORRY - one of the perks at being a media student @ Mac is our ridiculously fast server. And I was too lazy to build a pre-loader for the movie file... MY BAD.

Ah shucks... Ok - lunch break needed now.

can't say im not dedicated

Well, when the going gets rough - God provides.
It's past 3am and I'm working on my major. *wootwoot!!* Yes... the tell-tale signs of a dedicated student... aY? ahahaha... NOT!
Today was a mad day though. Lots of laughing, thanks to daggy jokes etc etc. And the "V" kicked in about 7 hours after drinking it... so now I'm awake and I've only done 3 scenes of Daniel's storyboard.. only it's quite funny to work on.

Atm.. listening to Brooke Fraser and chatting to Gerry (go to sleep man!) and Anthony (from uni - what a sad-case).

Ah shucks... I can't believe it's past 3am. That's the second time in 5 days I've been up this late... GARGH.

Ah well! Not to worry - today sure brought a lot of perks: Ryan brought me Halloween treats from America (which I'm supposed to share... buhahaha - YEAH RIGHT MAN - this bag of Hersheys are MINE!) ... had a funny-ass bus ride home with Suarez ... Jonna was on Australian Idol *wahoo! You go hot stuff!!* ... read a lil more about St Therese... the opportunity for acts of love: like finding a remote control for ppl in my tutorial doing presentations... ah shoot - that reminds me: I have a presentation to do next Monday.

YUCK.

Oh dude! It's NOVEMBER! The 2nd-last month of 2005 has come at last.

Oohh.. and here I am listening to NSync, Eagle Eye Cherry and Renee Geyer in the middle of a humid night, thinking about my high school music classes in Summer, mangoes, what I'm gonna wear to work tomorrow, and the person who's gonna wake me up tomorrow. *sigh*

Two weeks of uni left. YEEEEESSSSS.... =)