pungent

Kristone returned my HSC Extention English 2 Major Work last Saturday...
After sitting down to have a squiz and what was in my brain three years ago, I realised I haven't sat down and worked on a creative piece in a looong time. Sadly, I think my hibernation as a writer may have permanently affected my thinking processes - in a detrimental way.

I will admit though, it was exciting to flip through the pages with fond nostalgia and remember, with affection, the origins of my 4 characters - Kayla, Rei, Carson and Mario. Each with their own characteristics, personalities, families, stories, reasons, fears and journeys.

One beautiful thing about being a writer is the fact that an entire world, an unforgettable journey, and one or four or maybe ten different lives can come alive simply by using the right words in the right order for the right effect. Isn't it amazing that when I write "smelly" you know what I mean? But when I write "pungent" it gives a different meaning to "smelly?"

Ok time to shut up and go to bed.

I hate it when things get complicated. I like things simple. I get complicated and I hate that too.

But I guess I can’t help but wonder...Where are you right now? What do you look like? Are you tall, are you short… do you shave, what colour is your hair? What type of shows did you watch and what books do you read? Do you go to uni, do you have a job? How many people are in your family? Will I get along with them the first time I meet them?

Will I get along with you the first time I meet you?

Where are you and what are you doing? Are you awake… like me? Could it be possible that you’re typing away at a laptop in the middle of the night… after watching reruns of a teenage drama you were attached to in high school or downloading music by a rock band?
Will you laugh at me for wondering these things and asking these questions?
Are you sweet, sensitive.. or are you rough and closed off from the world? Are you passive or are you the initiator? Do you procrastinate or get things done?
Are we alike or complete opposites?

And while I wonder all these crazy things, I think to myself… I don’t even really know who I am… so how is it that I should be asking these things about you?

“You’ll meet a lot of different guys before you find the right one… or the guy you are with will have to learn from a lot situations like this before he becomes the right one”

STAND UP!

Wednesday...
- SPY rep council camp at Bonnie Vale... about 300m away from the beach [WOW!]
- Setting up Nereus' tent with much difficulty, until Mr Tjen came to the rescue
- Getting burried in the sand... lovely sunburnt mermaid.
- BBQ and roast potatoes for dinner... *yum!!*
- Session 1: Stand UP! - watching them trying to find a rope blindfolded... and watching them lead each other to Jesus [literally!] =)
- Walkin to the water hole and climbing up rocks for the beautiful view...

"I do not fear for I know that all that happens is part of His plan, and all that is His plan is for His glory and for His love..."

- THE STARS ARE BEAUTIFUL.
- Fireworks - Australia Day
- Girl talk ;o)
- Rain at 4:30am - **whoopeee!!** Jumping up in the middle of the night and yelling "the food!" cz we'd left it all outside...

Thursday...
- Bait hunting on the sand bay... watching nippers trying to swim away and finding my new friend "Hermit" the soldier crab
- Forgetting to release the fishing line when I cast out... *ahem*
- Building a Ninja-Turtle sand-sculpture and Tony & Courtney's desperate attempt to make sure it was safe from the tide ...
- Session 2: STAND FOR ...

"Do not let anyone look down on you because you are young, but be an example to the believers in your speech, conduct, faith, love and purity..."

- Fried rice with SPAM, corn, eggs and... (despite my violent protests!) capsicum

- Session 3: STAND PROUD...

"My grace is sufficient for you, my power made perfect in weakness..."

- Roasting marshmallows at midnight

Friday...
- Morning prayer on the beach... PEACE!
- Challenge: Fort-building in the sand bay ... until it rain started bucketing down.
- Standing in front of the tent for about 10minutes, drenched, trying to figure out what to do.
- The goanna trying to steal our bowls of spaghetti.
- Cockatoos biting its tail...
- Session 4: STAND STRONG!

"[Faith] is like a mustard seed that, when it is sown in the ground, is the smallest of seeds on the earth. But once it is sown, it springs up and becomes the largest of plants, and puts forth large branches, so that the birds of the sky can dwell in its shade."

- Swimming away from shore... beautiful sun, beautiful SUMMER... beautiful company

HUNGRY

This entry's a bit random. It's Tuesday arvo and the weather this week is drastic, yet I'm still planning to go camping at Bonnie Vale. Yikes... and I've never had to sleep in a tent before, and I'm seriously NOT as tough as people think I am!!

Meanwhile, I've been listening to "Relient K" and they seriously crack me up - yet they are a witty and clever band, so they're on my Fave List right now. I've been singing "Gibberish" coz it just sums up ME and what I'm thinking...

So... this morning I cut up Hershey's kisses and made choc-chip pancakes and had them with mangoes... yum yum...

And now I'm hungry.
Yikes

femz

Celebrating Femininity

Wow... I just had the girliest week I've ever had in my life. a good 6 days/nights consisted of shopping, boy-talk, nail-painting, talking about inadequate body parts, playing charades, cards, asking (embarrassingly) personal questions, teasing those in love, poking fun at those in "like" and making stupid jokes about crushes, body odour and being humiliated in public.
I love my YFC sisters. You women are my inspiration, my reminder to celebrate the beauty and love that God has shown me in abundance, and a reminder to KISS [keep it simple, stupid]...
Thanks for one of the best weeks of my life.

"You make my feel like a natural woman..."

Reality Check

"My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect in weakness."

[2 Corinthians 12:9]

Dear Lord... I pray for my dreams and goals for this year. Help me never to give up - to have the courage to say "no" to quitting. May I experience your justice, your mercy and your grace so it may lead to peace.

Take my liberty and my pride. Take my heart and my life and do with it what you will. Take my desires, my dreams, my goals, my hopes, and especially my weaknesses... and help me to bring glory to Your name.

Especially Lord... take my heart. You are calling me...

To those who read this... make me accountable to this prayer. =)

He makes no scents**

Confession: She developing a bad case of insanity. [Otherwise known as crush syndrome.]

She's standing at Wynyard Stn today waiting for a train to take her home. When it comes thundering through the tunnel her body groans - not just from it's lack of sleep this week, but because this fast-approaching rail vehicle lacks one essential thing: AIR CONDITIONING.

And so she steps onboard, thinking her 1.5hr train ride home is going to kill her... and then all of a sudden [wait for it!] ...

..... her nose gets a wiff of someone with "his" scent. [In other words some other guy in the carriage bought Lynx deoderant that week]

Hahahaha... and I'm laughing at her because she pulls this sudden face of relief, as if the 40degree heat means nothing anymore, because something tiny - like someone else's scent reminds her of him. And she's happy for the rest of the day.

What an idiot.

what we can't see

Doubt sees the obstacles ... Faith sees the way.

Doubt sees the darkest night ... Faith sees the day.

Doubt dreads to take a step ... Faith soars on high.

Doubt questions 'who believes?' ... Faith answers, 'I.'

[Author Unknown]

nostalgic insomnia

There was something quite unique about that sunrise.
Granted, I hadn't had any sleep that night. What with the archery at 9am that morning, with the high ropes course to follow... a half-eaten lunch and then heat-rash after the canoeing experience where me and Cassie's boat capsized when our plan to drown Dom backfired... and even after all that excitement, I still had time to get my hair dyed, watch the youth in fits of laughter or staring in awe during the brilliant display of talent during the variety night, and stay up for late-night games and "de-briefing" with the staff.

Me & Dom were in the common room for about 2 hours and all of sudden it was 4:30am and we heard determined teens rummaging through their blankets in their distressed attempt to press "snooze"... but by 5am they'd stumbled out of bed and walked up that confounded hill with combined determination to watch a brilliant sunrise.

And it really was quite brilliant... despite Phil & Jan's description of the previous day's artistic heavenly display. We spent about an hour watching grey clouds wander by, making pictures and finding friends.. I was warped and worn out to the bone, but I think that was a precious moment, sitting on the wooden table with Dom, Phil, Bec, Jan, Charmaine, Karen, Tony, Raf and Chris.

I remember for a moment this morning I closed my eyes and just listened to these young people chatting away to each other in the early hours of the day... and I opened my eyes and suddenly I say rays break through the clouds, and suddenly I was witnessing one of life's greatest lessons...

Everyday God will give us something priceless and unexplainable...

Everyday it will be up to us to put in the effort to find it.

There will be days

[like when the kids were getting out of bed],

we'll want to postpone the search, or we'll find an excuse and say we can't be bothered...

There will be days

[like when we walked up the hill]

we have to trek a difficult distance to get where we need to go so we can dig up the treasure...

There will be days

[like when we realised it was cloudy]

that the priceless treasure we yearn to hold will be hidden or concealed... and it will be up to us to see the beauty in having to look for the treasure... or perhaps in looking we'll discover a unintended treasure..

There will be days

[like when some people left because they thought it wasn't worth it]

that we miss out because of impatience

BUT

There will be times

[like this morning!]

When we are there to witness something breath-taking and unrepeatable, and we made the effort, trekked the distance, saw the value and waited patiently...

And the day's gift will unfold in all it's majesty.

new year rear-view

15th November

When I need to find peace I try to find a tranquil place that is separated from the rest of the world. Today the sky is a brilliant blue, fading into a white horizon. Traces of fluff are scattered across God's glorious, eternal canvas. No rain today. No bursts of lightning, no claps of thunder. Just a murmer of the city below me.. cars streaming over the bitumen, and the Spring breeze soaring between the leaves. The sunlight is trickling it's warmth past the branches onto my legs and toes.

I love how the trees bend to the wind flying past.
I love how the birds laugh and chatter.
I love that the busy-ness of life is reduced to a dull roar on the streets beneath me.

I'm sitting right behind the house that we snuck into.

I wish I was the person who would own that house... because this would be the church lawn I'm sitting on, the grey tiles that are in front of me would be the roof on which my kids perch on a Summer night, the paved street below would be where they ride their bikes and this amazing view of my city would be what they grew up seeing.

I can only hope... that they don't finish building this house any time soon...

The dry green grass is prickling my calves.

I'm intrigued at what sunset would look like from this perch.

Since I discovered this place in 2000, I've introduced the view to someone new each year.
There is only one other person I can think of wanting to bring here... but something tells me he just wouldn't appreciate the view. No wait... he would - but he wouldn't see what I'm seeing...

Thousands of lives, homes, memories, feelings and souls are frantically rushing by beneath me. But I am here, on top of this hill, under this beautiful tree (whose leaves look like spades on a deck of cards) and I'm thinking...

this is what peace is...